The first one
I need to be honest, I’m not sure how long I’ll do this blog. Fact is, I bought a domain and feel the need to get my money’s worth. I understand this isn’t the best way to gain readership, but like I said in “The Why,” I’m almost certain this will not be the next must read thing. It may only be read when I proof read it when I’m finished.
Anyway, this is what I wanted to write about…
The other night some friends of Emily and mine invited us to a civic organization. This group does a ton of great things for the community, everything from helping children to throwing community events… It’s great!
During the meeting the President had everyone introduce themselves. (Which was great because I knew a total of four people out of the 20 or so) The introductions went something like this for each member of the group: My name is Sally O’Malley. I work at such and such company. I am on Names 5 committees.Ā
This is great stuff, everyone in the room had a bunch of stuff said after their name.
Then. It came to me. You see, at the moment I am…sort of unemployed. So after hearing where everyone is in their career I thought… What should I say? Blogger? (I wrote the Why by that point) Consultant? (I like giving advice) I just wasn’t sure.
So what did I get out? “Bill Betson, first time here.”Ā I thought it was smooth. I even acted like I forgot to say my profession after the next person went by tossing up my arms a bit above the table and shaking my head in a “Ah Shucks” motion.
Maybe this is just how unemployed people think but I thought, “Why in the world do we place such an emphasis on our profession when speaking to others?” Have you ever thought about that? Why?
Yesterday I read an obituary from a man who suddenly died while shoveling snow. Guess how many times his family wanted people to know where he worked? One time. One sentence. That was it. The rest of the obituary focused on how awesome a father and husband he was. It focused on what he did for others.
Next time I go to a meeting and introductions are asked, I am going to say: “I’m Bill Betson. I am the husband to Emily and the father to Noah.”
I’ll even say that when I’m not kind of unemployed.
Posted on February 21, 2014, in Life thought. Bookmark the permalink. 14 Comments.
Bill Betson 
Perhaps because our society and culture places such an emphasis on working and working well. I think many people are defined by their careers- that’s who they are. I’m returning to work on Monday, and though I desperately crave to stay home with my baby, there is this movement in my generation of mommies to continue to work- a do-it-all mom. There is this invisible pressure to work, because that’s who we are and that’s what we are suppose to do. In today’s society, divorce is normal, both parents working is expected, and those who stay home to care for kids (mother or father) are often considered incompetent or not hard workers. When one thinks of being successful, I think many minds first think monetarily, that one is successful when successful in the work force. Money and pride are strong idols, and ‘successful’ careers serve both. All of this is only my opinion though š
Awesome point friend! It’s very true. Our culture has shifted from a focus on family to what we accomplish individually. You rock!
I really like that you have started this blog page bill, I enjoy hearing your opinion and insight into different things! Also love your points in this blog, as I frequently have wondered myself why we introduce ourselves as “my name is ____ I’m a ___career____!”
Thanks Jenn! You’re pretty great!
One thing is for sure, as a husband and father you have two of the most* rewarding jobs a man can have :). love blogs by the way!
Jen Matheney, you are so right. Thank you for the read and the comment!
My sentiments exactly Bill. Being a wife and mother are the best jobs I’ve ever had!
Bill I agree with you. When I meet new people (usually at school functions) someone always asks “where do you work” I usually reply with well my part time job is ….. but my full time job is home with my kids. Sometimes being a stay at home mom/dad is a lot harder then being out in the work force I personally think when introductions are made we should say our name and maybe a thing or two about us as a person after all….. our jobs are not who we are but what we do.
Becky, it’s so true. Samantha posted a comment along these lines above. Our society seems to give us these norms to follow. Thanks friend!
Becky, you are right. I know what kind of mom you are! Because you are so great, you probably work harder than most career oriented people.
Love the blog, Bill! I hope you write more because I love Emily and Noah and I don’t want them to go crazy… I think that part of the introduction process is to serve a practical purpose. It’s to help others make connections or to know who to approach regarding certain issues. On the flip side, I think it shows a longing for identity. We want to be linked to someone or something as a form of validation. It means we are important and our life has a purpose. We matter. Society should be okay with people just saying their name (the greatest form of self-acceptance) or saying whatever is important to them (like parenting).
Laura, we really do seek validation in so many different ways. All so that we feel needed to those around us. You rock friend!
I enjoyed reading your thoughts. Sometimes when getting to know people, I’ll ask if they are married or have children. Those are two milestones in life I look forward to reaching. I look forward to being a wife and a mommy. However, it is important to be present in the here and now. It takes self reflection to be aware of our identity, what we want it to be, and how we want others to perceive us. Since I can’t introduce myself as a wife & a mommy yet, its easy to introduce myself as a pediatric nurse: one because I’m proud and thankful that after attending school for 4 years I have my dream job, and two because sometimes saying “I’m a daughter of the One True King” doesn’t sit well with others. I’m realizing that my identity is what I make it. The way I think of myself is the way I display it to others. If we think of ourselves confidently and proclaim who we are to others when we introduce ourselves, that’s how they will know us.
Inspiring words Bill.
Kayla! It can get kind if awkward introducing yourself as “child of the One True King!” Too funny… But very true!